Desi doar prezentul exista, cumva “reusim” sa il ratam. Pentru ca suntem cu mintea undeva in trecut la ceva ce s-a intamplat ieri sau in viitor la ce urmeaza sa se intample dupa. Scot hainele din masina de spalat cu gesturi grabite si agitate. Asta pentru ca ma gandesc deja ca peste 5 minute mai am ceva foarte “important” de facut. Alerg spre un viitor pe care nu o sa-l prind niciodata. Sau inapoi intr-un trecut “da, intinsul asta de rufe imi aminteste de …”. Ceea ce se numeste trecut proiectat in prezent. Nu stiu cum e sa intinzi rufele pentru ca n-am fost niciodata prezent. Poate intr-o zi o sa ma opresc si o sa traiesc experienta prezenta. Intr-un viitor mai mult sau mai putin indepartat. Sau poate acum

E destul de trendy sa iti propui ca in noul an sa … Fiecare cu ce vrea. Bani, masina, casa, o gagica mai misto sau pur si simplu sa fie mai buni. Si e foarte bine ca ne dorim sa fim mai buni. Poate ca ce definim noi ca mai buni nu e chiar mai buni dar asta e o alta discutie. Dar undeva ne pierdem. Parca ne-am propus multe lucruri si anul trecut. Si ne-am amintit de ele cam o luna (caz destul de optimist) dupa care … ne-am amintit prin decembrie. Ai sa-mi bag, a trecut un an si nu am realizat nimic din ce mi-am dorit. Nu sunt un om cu nimic mai bun decat anul trecut. Poate am mai invatat 2 chestii dar nimic semnificativ.

Am fost oameni mai buni de Craciun si o sa ne mai tina cateva zile. Dupa care o sa fim iar noi cei care am fost si anul trecut. Partea asta cu sa fim buni de Craciun e evident buna dar parca ar fi mai degraba un bun inceput. Ca daca aruncam bucata de aur gasita inapoi in mocirla parca nu am schimbat mare lucru. O sa mergem iar sa ne spovedim (metaforic vorbind nu neaparat in sensul crestin) dupa care o sa injuram 2 babe pe treptele catedralei. Ca se iarta si la anul. Hai La Multi Ani!

Ramana spune că toate fericirea vine de la Sine, adevărata natură, viaţa care curge, Dumnezeu sau orice nume vrei sa-i dai. Fericirea asta e ca Soarele care străluceşte … ea străluceşte tot timpul. Tot timpul.

Mintea e ca o fereastră opaca. Dacă o închideţi, nu există Soare, dacă o deschideţi Soarele straluceste. Deci, am putea cred ca fereastra este cauza luminii. Credem ca fericirea (soarele stralucind pe deplin) şi nefericirea (fara Soare) şi starile intermediare sunt produse ale minţii (fereastră). Chiar daca soarele e tot timpul acolo. In acest context, cum facem sa “atingem” fericirea?

Ascultam nişte muzică şi mintea ta tace, soarele străluceşte. Deci, atunci spui că eşti fericit din cauza muzicii. Sau te întâlneşti şeful tău şi mintea devine agitat şi Soarele nu mai straluceaste. Şi nu mai există nici un Soare. Şi crezi că e din cauza lui. Ei bine … deschide fereastra

Suffering is all about me. We suffer because our model of reality does not fit reality and we cling to our model. As if reality would have to fit our model not the other way around. So if you suffer it’s always about you. Your expectations are not met. And you can solve this in 3 ways: change reality, change or drop expectations. Changing reality is the option we try usually and we know it does not work. Reality just does not feel like fitting our models. Changing our expectations does not work either … you just add another rule to the model and since the model gets more and more complex it shall fit even less with reality. So this means we will suffer at some point in the future.

 

So the hard way is in fact the easy way. Just drop the expectations. If your model does not exist, reality is fine just the way it is. No more suffering. Easy, right? So when we suffer we can always blame luck, others, karma and all other stuff. But the fact is that we suffer because reality does not fit our model. So what we should do in fact is look at our expectations … what expectations did we have there? How did we get from “I don’t like that” to “he hates me”? Because it all happened in our mind

It’s like a guy doing the work and then another one coming to claim his work like “Oh, I did all this! I should get a raise”. And the first guy actually believes him. And this goes on and on for years until the first guy actually looks into it. And can’t find the second when actually doing the job, only at the end of the month saying “I did that”. All the other guy does is speak about it. And when seeing that the first guy sees what’s going on he looks at the other guy and just throws him the “I see your trick fucker”.

And then the other guy takes another suit says: “Hey, he is bad! But look at me beating him. I am doing you good, I am trying to help you get rid of him”. And this trick goes on for a while until the first guy realizes the “good cop” looks familiar. And when he has the “aha” look the other guy takes another suit and comes to claim he spotted the trick. “These 2 are not to be believed but I showed you that, I am with you”.

And finally the first guy takes some popcorn and watches the play. And then the other guy takes a new suit and goes “I see this is only a play”. Silence … watching the new guy as part of the play.

We talk allot of just letting life flow. One of the tools to do that is the observer. Just looking at whatever is going on. And sure … this takes time if you haven’t done it before. And first day you try to sit in silence there’s a horde of thoughts that come up. And after 5 minutes you will be like “ok, that’s enought. Ican’t stand this anymore”. And that’s normal. If you have never done this in your whole life this is normal

And at first the observer is very reactive. Reacting to any thought that pops. “Shouldn’t think like that. That’s bad. ” And that only puts more thoughts in. So when you see this reactive thought look at that also. That’s what the observer should do … just look at what’s going on. Sure … after some time the observer will not be so reactive. And there is just observation. And sometimes reactive thoughts pop. And it gets furstrating: “Oh, I should just observe”. Well, guess what. Look at the reactive thought, look at the reaction, put the observer on whatever is there

Next one could look at something e.g. a wall and also look at the concepts that pop up about this. The concepts are an improved and worsened version of the reality. Improved because when the word wall comes up it comes with many things. And worsened because this is never about the wall in front of us. Try to drop words, what remains when looking at that wall?

And then the observer gets more and more like a second nature. And when fear comes just stay there and look at fear, when anxiety comes just stay there and look at anxiety. Just look at whatever happens, don’t run

And after some time the observer drops, there is just observation. Evrika …

PS It does not take as much time as you think it takes

The body is the buddy

Mintea minte

Game over. There’s nothing left then memories of a great warrior. And a corpse. But hey … the body seems to be alive. Nah … can’t be

The battle is over but there is still fight in this sword. The sword has to fight, there’s no other option. No one left to fight but the fight is not over. How to stop the fight? The sword looks at the warrior and understands. It swings and bang … the head  falls, the warrior is dead. The sword he carved killed him. The sword disintegrates, the battlefield disintegrates and nothing else then blood comes out of this body. Did this warrior have no soul?

The enemies keep coming and now he kills 3 at a time. He does not do it anymore. It’s almost as if the sword fights by itself. “Who am I?” ”Who am I?” ”Who am I?”. It’s been years since he is fighting and now the battlefield is empty. Some enemy comes from time to time, so weak that he almost feels mercy. Almost. But the sword wants to fight. The sword needs another sword to fight with. There’s no sword left to fight. The warrior puts the sword in the pocket and goes out for a coffee.